Don't dream, when you can't make it real. They're only fictions anyway - Moddi, A Sense of Grey

Dance, when you're broken open. Dance, if you've torn the bandage off. Dance, in the middle of the fighting. Dance in your blood. Dance, when you're perfectly free - Rumi

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Nov 23, 2011

These Beautiful Women, Lost Under The Stars

In the 25 years of my life, I have met some extremely fascinating women. Women with assiduous levels of strength and courage. Women who wage daily wars with their worlds; who have still made something of themselves despite being bound by an almost draconian society that seems to leave almost all of us suffocated by its orthodox ideology.

So today, I want to give these women a tribute. I want them to know how much I appreciate them, how much I am inspired by their lives, how much I wish to have the same grace and dignity with which they handle all their struggles and just how plain grateful I am for the comfort and support I find within them. So this one goes as a shout out to them and all those women world over who have found themselves in a similar place, but are yet to be broken down.

To Nasreen, Fatima, Shama and Shakeela: Women who have shown me the meaning of unconditional love and support and have taught me what family really means. They have given up their careers to build and raise the family of which I am so proud to be a part of and for which, no matter how many times I tell them I love them, it will never be enough. From these women, I have learnt what it means to make sacrifices for the ones you love, I have learnt respect and I have learnt how important it is to be a better person. I have seen their families bring them down, push them around and take them for granted and I have seen them do nothing, but give more love in return. They have taught me to have the courage to pursue my dreams no matter what stage of life I am in and to never give up on the ones you love. From them, I have learnt how to carry on even though never appreciated, to hope no matter how horrible the circumstance,  to keep on living even when everything seems to have been taken away from you and to leave what you have called home all your life and start over new in a place completely alien.

To Sahar: The sister, the best friend, the confidante, the tutor, the money lender, the stuff bringer, the feeder and over all evil genius. The one in whose lap I have cried for hours about my broken heart. The one who has seen me fail and fall countless times, but who never gave up on me. The one who I have watched suffer through intense trauma and tragedy, who has battled with depression and bipolar and who has known her own various heartbreaks which might leave many with a colder heart or a broken spirit, but she has only emerged with a bigger heart than I thought was possible. She has taught me how to be kind to strangers and forgiving to the most horrid of transgressions. She is, more often than not, my voice of wisdom. From her I have learnt what hard work really means. Truly, she is one of the most amazing women I know.

To my very own Amy Lee*: I hate to admit it, but when I first met her, she came across as someone with a one tracked mind; the kind that starts at clothes, ends at shoes and thinks of make-up in between. I've never been more wrong. She is this amazingly talented and really witty person who is a great writer, artist, singer and photographer. She has so much going for her, if only she realized it. She went through a few years of an abusive relationship and she bore it all without a soul knowing what was happening. Unlike others I have known, she didn't let it affect the way she dealt with other people around her. She was always cheerful and lively, making everyone around her laugh and have a good time. And even when things fell apart, other than her closest friends, she has never bad mouthed the guy nor bitched about him in anyway. She has taught me how important it is to put your problems aside and not let your issues ruin other people's day, that it is essential to be the bigger person in the relationship, not to give in to your baser instincts to try and destroy the other person and just try your best to carry on with the little pride you have left.

To Azeelia: Even though she recently became a part of our family, it feels like I have known her forever. She just recently lost a baby, but her morale and courage and the brave face she put up when most people would just give up on everything deserves a standing ovation. Each day that I meet her, she instills in me a whole new spirit of hope and faith. My problems are minute compared to hers and yet, she has accepted them with humbleness and dignity and dealt with them with far more grace and character than I have. I've learnt from her not to question God each time something goes wrong and sometimes, to trust Him and the way He plays the cards even if sometimes, it feels like He's cheating. And I want to thank her for not letting my faith go to hell.

To Samia: I haven't known her for so long, but from her I've learnt that broken homes don't always result in damaged children. Even though she's seen her parents go through an awful divorce, she has turned out to be a strong and stable person, not letting her circumstances influence who she became and how she lived her life.  She went to medical college and is now a doctor. She's one of the more down to earth and level headed people I know. Her story makes me realize that who you become is in your hands alone. No matter how dysfunctional your family and no matter how messed up the people around you, you alone are the molder of your character and your life and it is in your hands to make or break yourself.

To Maera: One of my best friends; crazy to the core. Although I've only known her for four years, it seems like a lifetime. She brought into my life a whole other level of friendship, love and of course the drama that comes with these things. I have watched her struggle with relationships and career choices and am often left  bewildered with the fire and spirit with which she lives her life and deals with her issues. With her, I have learnt not to take things too seriously and  how important it is to let go and just have some fun. She is this sexy, spirited, funny and crazy person who has made life a lot more bearable and pleasant.

And To Hani: Hani very recently came into my life, but left quite an impression. Her life has been, to say the least, chaotic. She's been through two divorces and in a society such as ours, that is seen as a major "humiliation". For her, everyday is a battle between doing what makes her happy and whats "right". She refused to stay in a marriage that didn't make her happy even though the world seemed to stand against her. She has built herself as a credible and respected individual in her field. From her, I have realized that it is important to have dreams, to be yourself no matter how scandalous that might be for others, to fight for what makes you happy and what you want, to not let the world's image of you bother you in anyway, to never let anyone try and change you just because it suits them and to be a successful individual in your own right.  She is a woman of mettle and I admire her for the battles she fights everyday.

If you know even one woman like the ones I have mentioned above, consider yourself lucky for you have a support system that is so powerful and unfailing, you can never lose your way.


  1. Not to be humble or anything but you really flatter me sweetheart! This was a real tear jerker.. unfortunately I read it at work and *plop plop* my office desk had a little pool of tears!

    Here's my 2 minutes of emo time: You forgot to mention yourself in the list of most amazing women bebe. Don't put yourself down hun. Jerks will come and jerks will go but chocolate, billos and besties will live on ;)

  2. Samia: ".... She's one of the MOST down to earth and level headed people I know...."?

  3. Putting a question mark at the end of a phrase doesn't necessarily make it a question :p so my question is, what's your question?

  4. Haha not really a question, it was more of a wonderment. I think you were perhaps going for 'most down to earth' but wrote 'more' erroneously :P

  5. Hani is my best friend from childhood and i've always admired her self confidence, her passion, her absolute faith in herself, her devotion to whatever undertaking and her unfailing love! she's a true woman of substance and i do not have the words to express how much i love her!